


Adrestian Tail Side-Stories

by Kronecker_Delta



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Fanfic of Fanfic, Gen, Technically Transformation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:21:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24542266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kronecker_Delta/pseuds/Kronecker_Delta
Summary: Some things I wrote up over the last few months related to Adrestian Tail (https://archiveofourown.org/works/22093897/chapters/52728148) by AMX004_Qubeley.Previously just posted on twitter through pastebin links, here's the completed 'set' (for the moment).Mostly silly, mostly humorous, mostly about Edelgard's mouse adventures and how the Sad-Dragon family is involved.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	1. Post-Incident, An invitation.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AMX004_Qubeley](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AMX004_Qubeley/gifts).



“Huh.”

It was not often that one saw her teacher and heroine of the last great war struck speechless, but that was certainly the sight that greeted Edelgard upon entering the study. The mansion was actually owned by the Queen’s consort, but had come to be used by friends and allies often over the years and after her last journey to visit Dimitri, Byleth had come here to rest for a time.

Only to find some odd mail awaiting her.

Edelgard had given it little thought at the time, even if the nature of the letter had been strange in appearance. But she’d realized that the company her once teacher kept now, while trustworthy, had odd habits to those they’d inducted as kin.

For all she knew Rhea was now forcing her poor teacher to read letters in thousand year-dead languages because ‘it’s part of your culture.’

But the expression…

“Is there something wrong?”

“Oh… well,” she said, placing the letter back on the table, “it’s something Sothis was waiting on.”

She blinked.

And then did so again.

“She gets… mail?”

“Apparently.”

“How often?” Edelgard asked, feeling a bewildering sort of weightlessness to the entire conversation. She’d managed to mostly come to gripes with… everything involving her teacher, but some parts she dealt with best by pointedly not thinking about at length.

“She’d been waiting on this one for… thousands of years?” Byleth looked to the side, expression going blank. Not the blank of being ‘away’ or anything. The sort that comes when you have to listen to a friend go on yet another of the same rants for the countless time and simple choose to zone out and ignore it. Then of course she said something that always meant trouble, “She’ll explain it better.”

Edelgard saved herself from taking the name of the very goddess about to appear to her in vain, but she still felt that dread settle on her as ghostly girl appeared. Whether a lingering effect of crests, ‘being saved from her idiot deaths too often’ (Sothis had not made the best first impression), or some hither to unknow effect of all the chaos of ‘The Incident’ the once-dead(er) goddess could appear to more than just her current vessel.

Not that many people really cared for that.

(She’d come to learn even Rhea had realized she might have had a rose-colored view of her mother from a conversation Flayn had once had.)

“… come on! It’s important. Do you have any idea how great a privilege it is to be invited to go to THE Smash Tourney. Everyone that’s anyone will be there.”

“The… the what?”

“It’s some sort of dueling club.”

Sothis put her hands to her hips and glared at Byleth, a gust of phantasmal air putting her hair all about for a moment as she did.

“A dueling club? Do not insult the greatest test of might for heroes of myth and beyond with such a… pitiable comparison. Your dueling club is like a duels of ants or… or other bugs!”

“Or mice?”

The sour expression on Sothis’s face was measure of pride. There was little anyone could realistically do to inconvenience her, but she had found the entire experience even more insulting then some of the others.

(Truthfully Edelgard might have been the only one to leave feeling more at peace with themselves than at the start…)

“Oh ha ha, quite amusing Queen of the Rodents, or did you think I didn’t see that absurd moment.”

“So, you saw the mouse alter they made of you as well?”

Sour was now an understatement.

“So anyway,” Byleth said, deciding it would be best to distract things before Edelgard further escalated her one woman spat with the goddess, “I guess since Sothis is-“

“Indisposed.”

“Yeah… I’ll just-“

“You’ll have to go instead.”

“I-what?”

“I waited on this invitation FOREVER Byleth, don’t mess this up for us,” Sothis said, now entirely focused on her vessel, oh spared a glance at Edelgard hoping for some escape from it. She of course had known at the moment, but her mind was racing as Sothis spoke. “Everyone will be there. Pauletena… oh, she was so rude about my chances of getting in. And then there’s league champion Mario… I believe an umbra witch. Marth and-“

Wait.

“Wait,” Edelgard spoke. “Who did you just mention?”

“Mario? Well, our chances aren’t the best there, he is the universe’s strongest plumber,” Sothis said, a thoughtful expression on her face. “But there’s no danger of injury or death so at the very least we can test our might.

“No not… what-never mind,” Edelgard said, stepping closer. “Did you say Marth?”

“Yes… oh right, his legend is known around here.”

Marth. The Marth. The slayer of the shadow-dragon, wielder of the blade of light…

The warrior that Edelgard had a three-inch figurine of and little rule book explaining how to use him in ‘Lineage of Flame (4th Ed)’ which she’d forced Hubert to play with her (before her professor had shown to be adept at various strategy games.

“He’s real?”

“Real and we’ll get to punch him in the nose!” Sothis said, striking fist to palm.

“When?” Edelgard said, picking up the card, and reading it. “Where?”

“When is an odd question since time won’t really… pass there? It will be like we never even left after the Tourney ends in week or two. As for where, well, it’s hard to explain.”

“Are you allowed to bring guests?”

“No… I mean, I think not,” Sothis said, floating over to be behind Edelgard’s shoulder. “Ah, yes. No guests, at most a pet or ‘warrior mount’ is allowed.”

Edelgard frowned at that. Finding out in the same day that your childhood hero was real but that you wouldn’t be able to meet them was a tad frustrating.

“Ah, don’t be so glum ‘Mouse Queen’,” Sothis said, not entirely over their earlier barbs. “I’ll be sure to get you a souvenir. Maybe a hat or something…”

Whatever irritation Edelgard felt at the reminder and rude nickname vanished as an idea, an impossibly odd idea came to her.

One that might, just might work.

***

“Hubert I’m glad to see you’re still here.”

He looked up from his books to see Lady Edelgard approaching. Still dressed for her ‘vacation’ as it were, hair down. But with an intense look in her eyes that told him some matter of importance had come to have her seek him out before he returned to the capital.

“Yes my lady, what can I do for you.”

Edelgard paused for a moment, showing the importance of whatever she was about to stay. Hubert steeled himself, knowing that this was likely a concern of grave importance.

“Hubert, you wouldn’t happen to have any polymorphus muridae would you?”

To his credit, Hubert did not accidentally stab himself with his pen as his hand twitched and he dropped the book he’d been holding on to his foot.

“N-no.”

“Hubert, I need you to be honest.”

“My lady, we-you, were quite clear about the punishments for use of polymorphic curses during the reforms.”

“Yes, yes I remember what I said-“

“To be set fire alive until dead.”

“I know Hubert.”

“Actually, quite merciful compared to what the church had been proposing, but understandable given how things played out.”

“That didn’t answer my question.”

“If you want someone to ‘disappear’ there are far easier ways to go about it.”

“It’s not like that Hubert,” Edelgard said, looking from side to side with unusual bit of trepidation. “It’s more for sneaking in somewhere…”

Hubert felt a dreadful shadow now. For he knew, deep in his heart that he might have to say ‘No’ to Edelgard.

_No, I will not turn into a mouse to spy on someone. I don’t care if I’ve secreted twelve different vials of the cure in safes, hollowed books, and elsewhere. I will not now or ever be reduced to eating bugs again my lady._

And even if it was for some other member of their spy corps, he dreaded that as well, since he could think of no surer way to lose the loyalty of one of their own then telling them their mission was to be a mouse.

“You see,” Edelgard said at last, “I need it to sneak in somewhere.”

“Oh. Well that’s different.” Then his mind caught up with his mouth and he rather slowly said, “Wait… what do you mean ‘you need to sneak’ somewhere?”

***

“So how does it look?”

_“Like pure insanity,”_ was the thought, unvoiced, in Hubert’s mind as he saw Bernedette showing off her sewing/doll making skills to cloth her wife…

Her wife, that was now a mouse.

But oh, Edelgard intended to be the finest dressed rodent that ever was (even better than Rhea during that uncomfortable period after ‘The Incident’ when they were still sorting things out and they made an attempt at normality).

So said mouse now wore a red dress/’battle-gown’ of Bernedette’s own devising. Some work on getting her hair dressed up as well.

“Well that will have to do,” she said at last. “I can’t really do more… not without being a mouse myself.”

That she was not proved that Bernedette had at some point found herself with more of a backbone than Hubert when it came to dealing with Edelgard. Something he had never really envied until now.

Or perhaps the fact that even she hadn’t managed to talk her out of this course of action proved just how stubborn she could still be…

Whatever other thoughts he might have had at the absurd sight came to an end as he heard someone approaching. Which should have been impossible has they had rather firmly told anyone and everyone that didn’t need to know about this madness (which was very nearly everyone, sadly excluding himself) to stay away until Byleth and Edelgard had ‘left’.

But now there were voices outside the door and someone.

“Don’t worry Flayn, we just need to find someone to talk sense into them.”

Rhea.

Rhea and Flayn and…

Seteth too.

_“Why sure, why not the worst possible group to find out about this?”_

The opened the door, took a look around the room, counting two humans, one of which was now standing in front of sewing kit and a great many garments meant for dolls with a guilty expression on her face.

“Where is Edelgard?” Rhea asked. Continuing to speak as she stepped in and drawing closer to Bernedette. “We’re trying to talk my mo-Byleth… them, out of this madness and they mentioned that she’d agreed to help them in some fashion.”

“You… you can’t really do that,” Bernedette said, her stutter briefly re-asserting itself as Rhea leveled quite the glare on her.

“And what do you mean by that?”

“Well… I mean, I already tried and you see-“

“What are-what is behind you?” Rhea asked, stepping closer and managing to look over Bernedette onto the table. Going still first in confusion.

Then shock.

And then fear.

“…”

The first sound that broke that silence, was, to put it frankly, such an embarrassing squeak of an utterance one would think she’d been the one transformed again into a mouse. Rhea leapt back, coming to a stop when her back it the door, eyes wide as she stared before her. The scratching sound that came next showed that once again (either lingering effect of the cure, the curse, or some sort of emotional distress) had caused her form to waver, her hands more like taloned claws and now leaving long marks along the wood as she pressed back against it.

“… why is… why are you…”

Flayn decided to get Rhea out of the room and hopefully restore her composure before she damaged something else. Seteth took over the interrogation, firm, angry…

“Wait… did you say Marth?”

Oh no.

Oh no…

There were two of them.

The anger soon departed, and now it looked as if Seteth was seeing if Edelgard could ‘get an autograph for him’ as well.

Honestly, he shouldn’t have been surprised. As they’d found out years later, Seteth had apparently invented the entire genre of tabletop strategy games and was likely the one soul alive to envy Edelgard’s chance to meet Marth (even as a mouse).


	2. Mouse-Pulsion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their rescue, a short 'Rhea figures out more/hears more'... and decides on the completely logical decision. As with all of these they were written right about when or shortly after the chapter itself came out.

The trip back from the Abyss had been… interesting.

One could forgive them for being unable to wait until true privacy to discuss recent revelations, and they most likely suspected that whispering in the voices of mice would have been enough.

It would have.

But Rhea was no mouse.

So, she had heard the hushed voices of Dimitri and Claude, and while not all of the context was present, enough could be gained from how they distanced themselves from Edelgard to provide the rest.

Such as it was, she’d done what she would have done at the start of this madness (had she only known of it) and called them all into her office, such as it was.

They were, after all, human children… normally.

“Some tea?” Rhea offered, motioned to the doll set before them, hot water and leaves helpfully provided by Cyril before he had left. The three lords and one teacher (the one once-human teacher, much to her horror and in some small measure gratitude; one could only dread the awful sort of complaining that would have come about if Manuela had been among the mice).

“Thanks Lady Rhea,” Claude said, taking the offered cup into his paws. Edelgard continuing to sit where she was nigh motionless with that distant look in her eyes. Understandable, and under other circumstances she’d have some sympathy for the girl.

It was never fun to have a family tragedy turned into a weapon.

But then she was in some sense the source of this ‘trouble’ wasn’t she?

Which should make Rhea… angry.

Very, very angry.

However even that emotional resource seemed for the most part emptied out now. Leaving an eerie sort of calm she hadn’t felt in, well, ages.

Perhaps burning cities was good for her emotional health.

_“Hardly, Mother would certainly disapprove and tell me about ‘negative emotional responses’ or something.”_

“I’m given to understand that this matter… started with your house Edelgard,” Rhea spoke, taking note of the accusatory look from Dimitri and how Byleth moved slightly to prepare to come between them if need be. “Could you explain why I was not informed of a possible assassin and poisoner immediately?”

“We… I…”

Edelgard hadn’t the words.

“Well, given your connections to the true culprits,” Rhea ignored the gasps of surprise from Dimitri (really, was he so lost in his own troubles that he hadn’t thought why she wanted to speak to them?) and continued, “I can think of no other possible recourse,”

Rhea stood up, Byleth immediately moving forward, for all the good it would do if Rhea had actually meant to transform and promptly devour the mouse-girl then and there. That caused Rhea to pause, looking sadly at the sight before shaking her head and speaking her judgement.

“Edelgard von Hresvelg, I am expelling you in dishonor and in full from the Officer’s Academy.”

One could have heard a pin drop outside the chamber’s door in the silence that followed.

“What?” Edelgard at last managed to croak out.

“Expelled. For numerous infractions against our code of conduct, which I do have your signature on, forgive me for not retrieving it,” Rhea said, motioning with her paws from one to the other, “but it would be a tad hard to ‘handle’ at the moment. Since I don’t have hands.”

She stared at her, obviously not expecting this result in the slightest.

“Since I’m a mouse, you see,” Rhea said, continuing, a bit of anger coming back before she saw Byleth placing a paw on Edelgard’s shoulder and that too departed for the empty feeling once more. “As are you, and dozens upon dozens more. All of which might have been avoided if you had simply told me in the first place.”

“You can’t… I-“

“I can you see. I suppose we could have a proper discussion with the other teachers here, but I do somewhat doubt they would disagree with my opinion. Especially not after they are informed of what you did and what I suspect you may have planned to do…”

The silence that followed was a palpable thing in the room.

“How much did you hear?”

Rhea turned towards Dimitri, saying sadly, “Enough.”

“But you can’t-“

“I can and I will. It will be troublesome writing the letter of course, I suppose Seteth can do that and I can sign it… never handled a pen with talons before,” Rhea said, looking at her paw and imagining something else, “but once done it will be off to your father. Along with you. Safely bundled up in the same… small parcel. Away from here forever.”

“Rhea I don’t think you understand.”

“Byleth… your loyalty to your student is admirable… but misplaced. If even half of what I heard is true, she’d likely have killed you as much as she would me once the time came. In truth I have every right to end her and the Hresvelg line here and now…”

That got a reaction from the whole of them… Byleth of course still standing protectively before her. But even Claude looked like he was deciding which way to ally himself. Only Dimitri remained where he stood… staring down, mind and thoughts somewhere far away and quite dark indeed.

“But I find I haven’t the heart for it. Besides, given your current predicament I think it should be quite clear what comes of making deals with those… sorts.”

“But… expelled?” She said the word with a disbelieving tone, as if the idea had never come to her that her attempt at assassination would be treated with such mundanity.

“You can’t do that Lady Rhea,” Byleth said. “She’s still a target for the Slitherers.”

“Why yes, I’ll have to make a note about that. Seeing how her former allies are not content for her to just be a mouse…”

“But how would I be changed back?”

“You won’t, not till I have a cure,” Rhea said, seating herself and feeling that same empty sadness yawn wider as she spoke. “Hopefully we’ll manage one before you grow too old…”

“What?”

Right, she hadn’t told them and they might not know… she hadn’t meant to say that out loud. Goodness, this was putting her out of sorts wasn’t it?

“Mice do not tend to… live long. And I do not speak of cats and owls and other sorts of things. Two years or so. Perhaps three if one holds on and staves off infirmity with good health.”

Claude was the quickest on the uptake. “And we’re already ‘adults’ more or less… so that’s not the real number is it?”

“A year. Maybe a year and a half. If we can find a cure or the materials to make it soon it will not be a severe concern… if not, waiting till next spring would have consequences.”

“So you don’t even need to bother killing me,” Edelgard said, the words tumbling out as she glared at Rhea. “Just send me off and let time handle it for you!”

“I do not intend to let the worst case come to pass Edelgard, as that would involve me having to explain to a great many rather important nobles, including some of my own Church, why their children our now older than they are… the mice issue will be bad enough.”

She simply shook her head, ears folded back severe agitation. “I-that won’t… that isn’t possible I’d…”

“She’d die before then,” Byleth said. “She has… health issues.”

Rhea looked from one to the other and then back again. “Would I presume that this ‘issues’ have something to do with her allies. These ‘Slitherers’ as you have decided to call them?”

“How could you possibly know?” Dimitri said then, while Claude looked at Rhea and nodded.

“They did this sort of thing in the past?” he said.

“Often enough. I don’t know the specifics, and as I feel I will repeat many times before this… incident is resolved, I don’t really care about what they would have done now, but unless there was something important about Edelgard’s body they wouldn’t have bothered to create the plan you discovered. And the only things ‘they’ would care about would come from their own meddling.”

“You can’t just send Edelgard off to die as a mouse!”

“I can’t?! I can’t?!!” Rhea said, yelling as she stood up, kicking the doll house chair behind her to the side. “I could do far worse. I should do worse… but what does it matter?! I’m a mouse… you’re a mouse… mo-… none of this matters.”

Rhea leaned over, paws upon the table and looking at the reflection of her own furred snout in the tea water.

“In all likelihood our atrocious look will hold, it will take far too long to find a cure and you will all die as mice… or be returned to life far, far too old for anything to matter. If the cure doesn’t kill you at that point, it is rather stressful on the body. Regardless, it will take ages to sort this out. I’ll be lucky if there’s not another war. Probably their backup plan anyway…”

Edelgard looked ready to speak up again, only stopped by the muttering coming from her teacher.

“What do I say to her!” Byleth very nearly screamed into a whisper directed at the air. Noticing only then that almost everyone was looking at her.

“What are you…”

Byleth looked pointedly at ‘something’ and then there was a flash… a hazy afterimage of light and-

“Ugh, I told you already I’ve done that far too many times today and I can’t manage it again… and I have no idea what to say to her when she gets like this! Read her her favorite bed-time story?”

“Sothis,” Byleth said, looking around at those around her who were now pointedly staring at something they hadn’t ever seen before.

“It’s not like I’ve been around her recently… she was the youngest hatchling too, so who even knows what she likes now.”

“M-mother?”

“Yes, Seiros what… oh,” the floating… mouse said. The floating mouse, drapped in impossible finery, befitting a Goddess…

But a mouse.

Rhea fainted dead away.

“Well… I suppose that did stop her from expelling your mouse-ling lordling after all,” Sothis said, floating over and looking down at her equally rodent-like progeny.

Byleth just standing there, a paw over her face as she tried in vain to ignore for one precious moment longer the keen stares she felt from the trio around her.


	3. 4th House Villain Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A snippet I wrote around the time the 4th house was introduced and all the 'Rat House' jokes started...

All around them chaos. The armies of the rats had taken the upper rafters, and even after their disastrous defeat in the storerooms enough remained that their victory was all but assured.

Edelgard felt fear curl within her, but this time she did not freeze. She drew her blade and pointed it with deadly intent at the oncoming horde. She had allies, new and old, and strategy that would insure victory here today.

Whipping about she yelled to those behind her, “Fire now!”

And the makeshift trebuchet let loose its cargo, flaming coals and mixed pellets of now near white-hot iron that sailed above them. Even so far from them she felt the heat at the tips of her whiskers.

And smiled as they struck true, several now dead rats plunging through broken floorboards into the abyss below…

***

“So… do you think we should do something?”

“Everything is going as planned Constance,” Yuri said, smirking as he set his mug down beside him. “For a paltry expenditure of our own resources we have neutralized now not only one, but several of the noble families of those that dwell in the light above. Ensuring our eventually victory.”

He tried his best evil smirk, but it was somewhat hampered by the bits of dust and splinters falling upon his hair from the battle above them.

“But sir, our entire food supply was-“

“Everything is fine! It’s not like we don’t have others.”

“About that,” Hapi said, looking up from where she had been polishing a dagger.

“What?”

“The rats ate it.”

“What.”

“The rats ate-“

“I heard you!” Yuri said, standing up, looking furious for a moment, before taking a deep calming breath, his (in his own opinion) devilishly charming smile returning. “No matter. Let our rodent armies eat their fill. We’ll raid the supplies of the monastery and-“

“About that…”

“What is it Balthus?” Yuri said, practically growling the words out.

“Well… ah, you see… the poison-“

“Yes, yes _the_ _poison_ what about it?”

“We lost it.”

“WE LOST-“

Deep breathes, deep breathes…

“What do you mean we lost the poison?”

“Well the supply we had from the alchemist that we stole?” As Yuri nodded and then waved his hands with increasing frustration for Balthus to get to the point, “Well, we lost it and… ah, the rats apparently tried to take hostages and-“

“They WHAT?!”

***

Most people would have expected a mouse to ride a cat.

Then again most mice weren’t Dimitri, heir of Holy Kingdom of Faerghus, and every bit as freakishly strong as a rodent (comparatively) as he had been as a human.

And most ‘mice trained cat plans’ weren’t concocted by a fellow that had an apparently encyclopedic knowledge on how to train unassuming beasts for purposes fair and foul.

Not that Dmitri much wanted to know why Claude had been planning to train attack kittens.

It was probably overly complicated and involved him having to fight without underwear or something equally ridiculous.

***

“That’s… that’s _fine_ ,” Yuri said. Glaring around the table. “Everything is completely fine and we have no reason to worry as soon, regardless of the size of their forces now, we will prevail and… we will…”

Next step of his genius plan, but seeing how this had most certainly not been any of the previous twenty or so steps he was a bit flummoxed at the moment.

All the more so when a flaming projectile blasted through the ceiling, wood and dust and the singed corpse of an armored rat landing directly in his upheld cup.

Yuri took one look at it, left eye twitching.

“BALTHUS! GET MY CLOAK!”

***

The battle had been joined by allies unexpected, a force of new warriors at least thirty tail in total.

Which probably said something about the count of actually people in the monastery above, but Edelgard was merely grateful for the allies. And thus all three nations, in a fashion, fought as one that day. For glory on the field of battle.

That was the sub-basement of the monastery, about two rooms over from the drainage tunnels and the catacombs connected.

Or they had been planning so, when a deathly purple light flooded the room, the torches snuffed out one by one.

And a cloaked figure, standing impossibly tall (by their perspective) appeared in the darkness.

“GET OUT.”

They fighting ceased. One an all, rat and mouse and cat and (was that a badger?) ceasing the conflict as lone human sorcery stood above them.

“Did you not hear me! GET OUT OF MY HOME YOU VERMIN!”

“B-but Master, have we not done your bidding?” cried out one of the rats.

Who was promptly incinerated.

“No! You-you were supposed to turn one, one person into a mouse!?” they screamed out, though now seeming more like an angry and petulant rant than a proclamation of dread that had come before. “Not three… four… how many dozens is this-I don’t even care anymore!”

“About six dozen sir,” said a voice behind the mage. Edelgard leaned closer, looking behind the man, and could scarcely see that they were not so much floating in the air on gusts of arcane power as being held aloft by their arms by a considerably taller man standing behind them.

“I DON’T CARE BALTHUS!” they yelled out, turning briefly to glare at their assistant. “And then you ate all of our food. Not your food. OUR FOOD. SO GET OUT. LEAVE.”

Nobody moved.

“Alright, let me be clearer about this,” the said, rubbing their head for a moment as their other hand began to glow once more. “You are all, fired. And you will now leave, or I will set you on _fire_. Do you understand?”

Whatever response might have come next was not heard.

Because at that moment the ceiling above them, which connected to the abandoned wine celler below the proper wine cellar which was connected by an old hidden tunnel that they had only recently battled the dark rat clerics in, came crashing down.

Because apparently there had been a dragon up there.

Being ridden by their…

“Professor?”

“How…”

“Huh… wonder where Teach found that?”

The torches seemingly relit themselves as the power from the mage faded, and they were dropped to the floor as the great green-scaled creature leaned over to glare at them.

“Finally,” Byleth said, looking haggard and sleep deprived. “Finally-no, you were not right.”

They spoke loudly as they looked off to the side at nothing at all.

“There was not a secret… house…”

Byleth looked at the mage and his muscular assistant seated upon the floor.

“Stop laughing,” Byleth said softly under their breath. “And you two. If you even move a muscle Flayn will eat you.”

“I will not!” said the dragon, in a voice that was familiar and entirely unsuited for a beast of legend.

Byleth merely glared at her.

“I mean… I won’t because I-I’ll just use my claws or something,” she said, trailing off as Byleth turned towards the mouse army.

“Where is Edelgard?”

After following the throng of tiny paws pointed in her direction, Byleth carefully stepped across the battle lines, coming down on one knee. Letting Edelgard see that she looked even more tired and miserable than she had first guessed.

“This took far too long.”

“I… I thank you for my rescue,” Edelgard said, shouting as loudly as she could to make sure that she was heard. “But I have a great many questions…”

“Why is there a dragon?”

She looked at Bernadette and nodded. “Yes, that one is very important.”

“Because _somebody_ ,” Byleth said, with an intensity she had rarely ever spoken with before, “got thirsty and drank the entire antidote. And then had an… allergic reaction to it.”

“So… there’s no antidote,” Edelgard said, an awful feeling of dread filling her.

“No, don’t worry about it. Hubert’s getting more.”

***

It had been awful.

Dreadful.

Painstaking and smelly.

But he’d managed to find just enough ingredients to make the contents of the bottle in his hand.

Now all he had to do was sneak back into the monastery and-

“Ah, Hubert.”

“L-Lady Rhea.”

She was… looking at him strangely.

“Out late?”

“Yes?”

She nodded, stepping closer to him. And looking down.

Goodness, she was tall.

He felt small, as if he was the one in need of the antidote and not the members of his house. Some tiny mouse in the claws of a great and terribly winged predator.

“Do you have it?”

“Have what-“

“Do you have the antidote Hubert?” Rhea said in a tone that clearly implied that whatever patience she normally had, that supply had been entirely exhausted.

“So you-“

“Hubert, if you do not have the antidote I am going to have to explain to a great many very powerful noble families, men and women of considerable wealth and power, that their heirs and children, the fruit of their wombs and the jewels of their hearts… are currently rodents,” Rhea said, each word coming out with perfect, even tone. But carrying threat that made his knees weak and had him suddenly feeling like rank amateur when it came to intimidation. “So again, do you have the antidote?”

He spoke not a word, holding the bottle up before him.

Rhea looking at it.

And frowning.

“Will that be enough?”

“It-it will suffice. The amount I was able to make could cure a dozen. More than sufficient for those affected.”

“… a dozen?”

Something was wrong.

She didn’t even speak, simply putting her arm around his shoulder and gently, yet with a firmness like iron shackles, guiding him towards the dining hall.

“I… I would have made more but the herbs required are quite rare and some of them our out of season so-“

“I understand Hubert, life throws many trials at us,” she said. Though the weight of her words made it seem like she very much did not understand and very much did not care. As they came before the doors of the dining hall she turned towards him and asked, “When, exactly, will those herbs be ‘back in season’?”

Hubert didn’t speak. Simply swallowing nervously as he tried to hold her gaze. And then looked away.

Just as she opened the door and guided his vision into the dining hall.

Where several tables had been pushed together, a feast of sorts set aside for an army of rodents baring the battle standards of the three houses.

The full numbers…

“Someone thought it a good idea to poison others,” Rhea spoke. “And then they lost the poison and it ended up in a keg shared by yet more. And then that keg was stolen and passed around… well, I think you see the problem, don’t you Hubert?”

He did.

He looked at the bottle in his hands, the fruit of a weeks effort away from the monastery and searching high and low for ingredients.

“I-I’ll get to work.”

“I would suggest that you do. You can start by helping me write letters to our illustrious noble benefactors since I seem to be short on staff that can carry a messenger scroll at the moment…”


	4. Alternate Thales Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And here's the final one (so far). Dealing with a little family bonding in dealing with some family impostors.

Edelgard couldn’t believe it.

That long nightmare of fur and tails (and goodness, those teeth!) was at an end. For her anyway.

The majority of the cure had, once it was assuredly known to be a cure at not something else, remained in the possession of their (human) instructors. It had been decided that while they couldn’t dilute the small amount down enough and cure everyone, they could produce a solution to the age problem… of course that meant that Edelgard was going to have to deal with being the sole human member of a house of smaller ‘mouse-people’.

Herself and Lysithea had been the sole exceptions, as their unique issues had predicated a more complete solution as there had been some fears about what might happen otherwise.

That that information had apparently gotten out, at least to a select few of those at the Academy bothered her. But given how she’d been knocked out for days following her last battle against her brother she should have suspected as much…

There had been questions asked, and Byleth could only obstruct Rhea (when she was sober) so much.

“So, do you wish to speak on this matter?”

Which was why the pintsized mouse leader of the church now stood on the end table beside her bed. Edelgard had hoped to just enjoy being human but unfortunately that didn’t seem to be possible for her at the moment. Instead she now found herself being questioned as to what, precisely had occurred that made her the target of such a strange… plan.

“It’s not really something you personally need to concern yourself with Lady Rhea.”

The silence lasted far longer than either likely felt comfortable with. But Edelgard was feeling particularly stubborn…

(And Rhea was still coming down from quite the bender as it were.)

“Is this why you and Lysithea have the same color hair?” she asked at last. It was difficult for Edelgard to judge her expression now, now that they were not both mice, but she was sure that Rhea was thinking things over rather deeply as she spoke. “I had never given it much thought… but it was unusual is it not?”

 _“Of course, our problems wouldn’t concern a creature like you.”_ Edelgard managed not to voice those words, though it was more a struggle than she’d like to admit. Even after their victory in the Abyss it hadn’t been till she’d laid in bed lacking a tail that she’d truly realized how utterly exhausted she was from this entire adventure.

“What did they do to you Edel-“

Sharp knocking at the door came then, interrupting Rhea and surprising the both of them. Rhea raised her voice to ask who it might be, before realizing the pointlessness of that exercise. Leaving Edelgard to climb from her bed, feeling the wooden floors on feet instead of paws (such an odd sensation she’d never really focused on before) and walking over to said door.

Which opened not to the guard who had carried Rhea to her room, and now lay slumped nearby quite unconscious (one would hope). But instead to her-

“Thales,” Edelgard said, her surprise making her voice utterly dead and emotionless. She stepped back, heart pounding and managing to steel herself before she grabbed onto the table behind her. That this utterly obscured Rhea’s presence was fortuitous circumstance. He looked her up, taking care to see the eyes, which were too tired to fully hide the burning hatred she felt for the man.

And he smiled.

“I see it worked then.”

_“Does he… can he really think?”_

“Y-yes… there was some difficulty but in the end everything went according to the plan.”

“I didn’t believe it when that wench Kroyna sent message that it had succeeded. What became of Solon?”

“Dead.”

_“And by Kroyna’s hand, which can only mean she lied to you further after she took her own stolen cure…”_

He walked closer, placing his hands on the sides of Edelgard’s shoulders with a friendliness she did not find welcome at all. Her back side hit the table, causing it to rock… and she felt tiny paws take hold and climb up her back.

“A shame that Edelgard was the only survivor, but better a woman than dead I suppose… we’ll set you upon the thrown by Spring.”

“What of my father?”

“Ha! That old fool? I’ll lace his ‘medicine’ with something to stop his heart instead of just addling his mind and he’ll be dead by dawn. You needn’t worry about that,” Thales said. His smile fading as he looked at Edelgard and leaned in closer. Thankfully Rhea had perched upon the opposite shoulder. “They haven’t managed to find a cure for the others, have they?”

“They may have?”

“Pity, and more so that Solon wasn’t able to keep his disguise or remain alive. It would be so much simpler… but thankfully there’s quite a few cats in the monastery and they’re all caged together.”

“Surely they’d notice?” Edelgard asked, her heart pounding faster, her efforts to disguise her identity all but forgotten as the danger facing her friends and companions became clear to her.

“I checked before I came here, there’s not but some orphan whelp guarding them. The men I brought with me can deal with him and set the cats upon the rest. There may be some survivors, but every one lost will make the coming war all the easier…”

Her blood felt cold in her veins, the whole world slowing down as the disaster imminent became all the clearer. Thales… Thales could- _would_ kill her if he realized their plan had failed. They had no need for a rebellious princess and had clearly made their intentions entirely to obvious for any other options. But if she played along…

_“Bernie…”_

She reached behind her for the candlestick holder, for all the good it would do to strike down her ‘uncle.’ Her fingers had only just closed about it when a ferocious growl came from beside them both. Edelgard feeling the now forgotten weight of the Arch-Bishop return greater, far greater than before. Just as it leapt off of her, and onto Thales, who raised his hands to defend from the draconic beast trying to rip his throat asunder. He pulled a dagger from his belt and tried to stab it into Rhea’s chest.

Only for a swing of that candle stick to knock it to the side.

“Stupid boy! Help me before-“

“Certainly Uncle,” Edelgard said, picking up the discarded dagger and driving it into his side, twisting the blade and holding it tight. “Let me help you pass on as I did Solon and the rest.”

“Ed-elgard… you… damn you…”

Thales spoke his last, as Rhea’s claws found purchase about his neck now that he hadn’t the strength to hold her back.

And that was how Setheth found her holding ‘the minute Immaculate One’, both rather stained with another’s blood, some minutes later. There was little time for questions as there were cats to secure, assassins to stop…

Which was all the better, as Edelgard really didn’t want to think about how Rhea had started muttering about ‘Mother’ and more or less just clung to her in that ‘draconic-mouse’ form she’d been able to assume.


End file.
